Is an Expression of You

Post Of The Day

Showing posts with label online dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label online dating. Show all posts

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Begin Online Dating. A Simple Overview

/ No comments
We (meaning you and I) made the decision to begin online dating. But, now we are in the same boat. I am confused about how to proceed with it. And so are you. I decided to write this simple overview to help us both out.

Decide What Your Dating Interests Are

Decide Who We Want
Love from Anywhere
So many sites to choose from, it is hard to decide where to join. For starters, I think it is a good idea to either write down your dating interests or have a good idea of them in your mind. 

Let us think about what we want. Are we only interested in certain types of dates? Meaning, do we really only want to find love with a single person who is from a different race or culture? Such as meeting Philippine singles or Thai girls.
Or, would we want to meet a fellow dog lover or vegan. If we are firmly wanting to meet people who fit these criteria, we may want to join a niche online dating site. These cater to people with yours or mine own interests, so it stands to reason that one of us at least can snag a partner off of these.
I for one tend to like Asian girls, so I would want to find a suitable Asian or Filipina one to join.

There are tons of niche sites online to make our choice from and the possibilities seem almost endless as to what interests they cover.

If you don't need a special group of people to go out with then maybe it is ok to choose a general site. People on these are interested in virtually anything. Marriage, dates, dogs, whatever. If you want serious relationships and are not interested in only a niche then these are a good way to go.

We may decide to hook-up for sex. There are casual sites that are sort of between general and adult, and then there are the adult ones. It seems that they are both good in terms of looking for a sex partner.
Finally, there is the alternative type. This is really good if that is your thing. But, I would like to point out that a good adult or casual site often has people with these interests. Once again, it is your decision.

 What Are The Benefits of Membership

My advice to both of us is to take some time and look over what they offer in terms of membership. This is important because they do vary from one to the next in what you get, whether free or paid options.
Send Romantic E card
There are websites that provide reviews of the different dating sites that you can find online. Maybe, it is a good idea to check out some of those to see what they have to say about each one. Do not however take what they say as final. I think it is ok to use them as a general guide but we should make our own decisions. Sometimes maybe the guide is outdated or who knows what.

So by doing some internet searches we have arrived on a website that we want to check-out. This is where I like to look at what they offer in terms of memberships. Do they have free memberships as well as paid? If so, then just what will they tell us about the benefits of each type of membership. I like everyone else, like to get a lot for free.
 For a more in-depth explanation of online dating services try here

 Some offer free types of flirting or attention getting techniques that can be nice. 
These consist of things like: 
-free e cards that you can send to members
- free flirting
-free winking 
-and some offer so many free emails that you can send. This is nice because maybe we can get lucky and get some attention right away.

Paid features are also important to look at before we decide. What will we get for our money. Again, some offer more than others and some have different ways of letting people communicate. This is a personal decision that we must make for ourselves.

 A good site that I know of offers these and other features: 
-priority listings above other members, so that you are the first person they see. 
This is cool because it means yours is not the profile that is buried under all the rest.
- Another option they have is to text other singles. 
 This is cool. Texting means doing it from the cell or android and not having to sit at your desktop. A definite time saver and an option that makes it so much more convenient to date online.
 -Then there is the chat and video chat features. Awesome, we can see who we are interested in live on cam and even hear their voice. 
 Cool way to get to know someone I think.
These are just some of the features and benefits that I like to look out for when choosing. But, choose for yourself.

Terms and Conditions

Read the Fine Print
Know What You Agree To
 A very important thing to do before you whip out the credit card is to read the dreaded fine print. Go to the terms and conditions page and take the time to read over it. Hopefully, this page answers a lot of the questions that you have about what the website offers. Importantly, it should give the terms  and conditions of your payment and possible refund if you do not like the site after you join. Please, read this and decide it they sound right to you. You may not be given much time to try to cancel your order or get any refund so be sure. And last, but not least at all, is the fact that many sites in any catagory nowadays usually have automatic recurring payments. You may want to watch that.
A slower way to gain access to all the benefits is to send a check by mail. Some sites offer this.

Congratulations! We joined. Now what? 

Personal Profile

Now ladies and gentlemen is the hard part for most of us. Making the dreaded profile so people will look at us and hopefully contact us.
Show Yourself in a Positive LIght
Why State the Unnecessary

It is a good idea to not seem needy or too strange at this point. Do not begin your online dating experience with a headline like "lonely guy who hasn't had sex for 5 years." These types of messages anywhere in your profile will probably insure you stay that way. Alone at night! 

Do not start off by bragging about yourself either. Nobody wants to listen to you tell them how great you think you are. Instead, it seems a better idea to portray yourself in a positive light. We can and should mention our strong points, but in a round about sort of way. Maybe something like on Sundays after we go for a long swim we like to spend time at the nursing home talking to old people who don't have many visitors. Maybe that is a bad example but I think the point is obvious.

I think it is good to be honest right from the start, but that doesn't mean that we should give away private or unnecessary information about ourselves. Don't mention that you were involved in a drive by shooting or that your mother is in an insane asylum. Others do not need that type of information about you, at least not for along time.
Another obvious one, and one that most sites forbid members to post, is giving your phone number and address. Of course, do not make yourself vulnerable to any weirdos.

Don't be so generic in giving your interests or likes and dislikes. It is not very thrilling to sift through a thousand profiles that read virtually the same thing.
 Honestly, it makes a person wonder if they are serious or even real. You can mention that you love spicy chile during cold weather instead of just saying that you like to eat warm food when you are cold. Or, instead of just telling us that you like to read you could say you like Charles Dickens, for example. 
It can be hard for us to write about ourselves, but it is important to take the time and make a good one. If you need to why not browse other peoples profiles and see what they put. It is obvious when you see a nice one! Nice article about internet dating is here

Profile Pictures

Profile Pic
Choose Appropriate Pictures
There is new information out there now about the science of pictures in your dating profile and how well some types perform against others. I am not going too in depth about that here because it could get too wordy. However, there is now recommendations, to not take a selfie and post it online. Apparently, there is thought that there are already to many selfies. Personally, a selfie is fine with me but it should be a nice one. For girls, I have seen recommendations that photos taken with a side view are better than some frontal views. There appears to be psychological evidence to support these new opinions. There probably is too.
Do not worry to much at first about your profile because you can always update it later on.

After we have made our profile we can get down to business and search for our new online friend. Many sites have differing search options but usually it is broken down into sex, age, location and various interests.

That's it! We have started online dating.

Well, I hope that I have helped us to begin our online dating journey. This was a basic overview and there is a lot more that can be discussed but in the interest of letting you get started, I will end here.

Day after day I was surfing the internet and everywhere I went I seemed to see ads for online dating sites.

More from Dating Expression

Recent Posts